Do We Have to Fail...Before We Succeed?

Most would say emphatically, "Yes." After all, we've heard this our whole lives....especially after we fall down, lose a game, or miss a putt. We feel dejected, embarrassed, and hold our heads low; however, it is at this point that a loved one steps in and (wanting to help) usually offers up this beauty...... "You know, all the great ones fail before they succeed."

How many of you (at that moment), wanted to punch that person in the neck? Probably not the greatest advice given during your moment of dejection.

Anyway, it is this very topic that I have been pondering lately. Many of you know that I teach high school. This year I was given the indelible task of taking on Laguna Beach's Senior Class. All I heard (before I took the job), was that I would soon be faced with a challenge that I hadn't seen in my 10 years of teaching: The challenge of "entitlement."

What do I mean? Let me explain because I didn't really understand what those people were talking about either.

Entitlement is defined as: the right to guaranteed benefits.

Basically what I was being warned against was the student who believes that they are "entitled" to whatever they want. They've grown up in wealthy homes, been given whatever they've asked for, and been protected throughout their lives by the very people that supply them with those wants. Therefore, when it comes to their education, the same thing (at least in the kids and sometimes in the parents' minds) should apply.

If a kid is struggling: bring in the private tutor. If that doesn't work: put pressure on the teacher. If that doesn't work: put pressure on the administration. If that doesn't work: put pressure on the district supervisor, etc. etc.

Before you know it, the kid has the grade he desires but doesn't quite deserve. Does the kid care? No. On the contrary....they believe they are "entitled" to this privilege.

Anyway, why do I bring this up? Tomorrow, my seniors take their finals. I have one student in particular who has struggled all year. Struggled to turn in work. Struggled to come to class. Struggled not to cheat. And therefore, struggled to get a passing grade. She is "earning" a 42% right now and if she can't get up to 60% by tomorrow, then she will in fact FAIL my class and thereby FAIL to graduate. She will not walk with her friends, she will be humiliated, and the tears will definitely flow.

She approached me today and said, "Mr. Hendrickson, I have to pass this class or I won't graduate." My response, "Really, that's unfortunate." Her look of "entitlement" stared back at me. You know....the look that said, "Oh, I WILL get a passing grade." She spun on her heel, turned around, and marched back to her desk.

So what to do? Things are going to get U G L Y. Tomorrow, she will most likely FAIL the final (unless she cheats), and then I will be (once again), be faced with the indelible task of "teaching" her a lesson.

I will put my arm around her in a comforting mentor-like touch and tell her this sage advice......."You know, all the great ones fail before they succeed."

I wonder if she'll punch me in the neck.