The Lady Breakers are a new team this year (see a few posts below). We lost not only 3 of our best players but 3 of our most competitive, which I believe is worse. How many times have you been a part of a team where some of the other players on your team just "want to have fun" rather than win. How frustrating is that? Therefore, this attitude breeds contempt on both sides. We have 2 returners from last year who realize that "fun" is had in winning. And in order to win, you have to be committed, dedicated, and have a competitive streak. When they see the other girls not trying or not coming to practice or saying it's "that time of the month" and not suiting out....it pisses them off.
I have one girl on my team who is our star player. She is a sophomore and hasn't missed a practice or a game in 2 years. I wonder as a coach, how come it's never "that time of the month" for her? How come she never "gets sick?" How come she never has to "go study with her tutor?" How come she doesn't have "family emergencies?"
Obviously this girl gets frustrated during the games because she not only gets double and triple teamed but when she makes the appropriate pass, the other girls drop it or when they do catch it, they give it right back. It's more of a mental grind for her all game. She has to bring the ball up against pressure, finally gets it past half-court, and passes it to the open girl. Not 2 seconds later, that girl gives it right back because she freaks out when she has the ball and doesn't know what to do.
Well, this makes for a long game for this one girl so sometimes she yells at them or tells them to pull their heads out. This of course, makes either the other girl cry or yell back at her saying, "Don't disrespect me like that?"
We actually had a verbal fight the other day on the bus between almost every girl on the team and this one girl. They teamed up against her saying, "she is too intense" and "doesn't say nice things on the court" and "is too critical of their play." I actually had to intervene as a coach before it came to blows.
Of course, (internally), I side with this one player but I have to be PC and not choose a side. I wanted to say, "Look, she comes to every practice and every game and you guys don't so she has every right to yell at you and tell you that you suck." But I didn't say that. Instead, I said, "We are all competitive in our own way and what is said on the court shouldn't affect your relationships off the court."
We are 0-5. We've lost games by: 55, 45, 1, 12, and 5. Yes, we lost our first two games by 55 and 45. That is not good. However, as the scores indicate, we are getting better. We have 3 more games next week. I actually thought we had ironed out the wrinkles and were ready to go but even after all that, on Monday (our first practice after these 5 games), we only had 7 girls dress out and we have 12 on the team.
And yes, a few of the girls that didn't come or dress out where the same girls who were yelling at this one dedicated player. Go figure.
Advice?
Signed,
Confused in Laguna
6 comments:
I don't know about advice...but that cartoon made me laugh. Anonymous would have loved it!
Girls suck, that's all there is too it. Sorry.
I don't want to be the bearer of bad news, but isn't the margin of victory attributeable to the teams you played instead of your team getting better?
I am going to bore you with an email exchange I had with my freshman baksetball coach with whom I have had little or no contact for 30 years or so.
Kyle, not only have our opponents been worse but we didn't have our 6'2 center those first two games either. So you are right...are we really getting better or just getting healthy and/or playing lesser opponents?
However, even if you play bad teams, mentally it feels a lot better when you can actually get the ball to half-court and set up some semblance of an offense. :)
Come on Dro, you need to get them to believe in you: http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1808745509/info
If they watch that movie and don't come away inspired and hungry, then cut all the whiners and play 3 on 5 if you have to.
Or, better yet, get Gene Hackman and Hoosiers on them. Coaching girls would be tough. How do they react to yelling, screaming and constant ridicule. My football coaches from 4th grade through college liked that approach.
I'm trying to get my better half on here to give some advice--she dominated MVHS--led the county in assists etc etc.
Maybe have Lou Ann get out there and throw down--she was pretty tough on the court in her day.
Dro, dro, dro... I suggest you take a walk down the hall to chat with the LBHS cheerleading coach because if the fighting is bad on the basketball team, you can only imagine what is going on with the cheer squad. As a former HS cheerleader and former HS cheerleading coach, I can tell you that you these are girls FIRST and basketball players second (or 55th or 23rd as the case may be for most of your players.) They need to talk and relate and connect. You were totally blessed last year with the girls, or rather PLAYERS, that you had. These Breakers are different though. Cheerleaders have "positive circle" to solve issues like this. Here is what you do. Make them all sit in a big circle, facing each other. Then they take turns going around the circle. They each get a chance to say what is on their mind. No one is allowed to interject or interrupt. You have to play ref on this one. After they say what is on their minds, in turn, then what we call the "bitch session" portion of the positive circle comes to a conclusion. I warn you. It might get ugly. Set ground rules: no swearing, no name calling, no ganging up. If there are two people who are the main ones going at each other, then give them a chance to civily work it out in front of everyone at the end. Time them.
When their time is up, it turns into the real positive circle. Everyone MUST say something positive about (in this case) the girl that they are upset with. And the girl must say something positive about the other players. Or each person can just say what they enjoy about being on this team.
I don't know what it is, but by the end, they will probably be apologizing and hugging and crying. The majority of the animosity and anger will be released.
It is going to take a while (maybe a whole practice one day) but it will be worth it in the end because they will play better together after. Try it. I promise it will help you. You asked for it.
Post a Comment